| CV Of The Year |
  |
This Kid will go far…
This is an actual
job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald’s restaurant in
Florida; and they hired him because he was so honest and
funny!
NAME: Greg Bulmash.
SEX: Not yet. Still
waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company’s
President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a
position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first
place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a
Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and
we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD:
Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I’m
worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of
stolen pens and ‘post-it’ notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It
sucked.
AVAILABLE FOR WORK: Of course. That’s why I’m
applying.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30 – 3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday and
Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better
suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT
EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL
CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UPTO 50lbs?: 50lbs. of
what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the appropriate question here
would be “Do you have a car that runs?â€
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL
AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? : I may already be the winner of the Publishers
Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no, on my
breaks, yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:
Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb blond supermodel who thinks
I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that
now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF
YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries.
|
| Posted: 8/3/2008 at 14:09 | Read 21 times | 0 comments | Leave Comment |
|
